In the Belly of the Beast
by Vivienne Grainger - Bleach
Summary: We all know who, between Renji and Byakuya, will carry the children, right?  Right? Mpreg, if you hadn't guessed.


Conversation with a friend can certainly derail your best intentions, especially with NaNoWriMo looming (National Novel Writing Month, for those of you not in on the loop: a non-contest whose aim is to achieve the first draft of a novel in the 30 days of November. DracoQueen22 brought it to my attention. NaNoWriMo means writing about 3.3K - yes, 3300 - words _a day_ for 30 days, not a bit of it fanfic. Wish me luck.) But, Lady Bad Luck and I were chatting about Renji and Byakuya, and this came up: and so did the ears of the Muse. As always, I am but her keyboard monkey.

Also, she has absolutely no shame. I'd _never_ write male pregnancy on my own, but I should have known that Muses who become interested in a particular story will eat personal pride for breakfast to get the tale told.

Or at least mine does. And she doesn't even put any sugar on it.

Beta work performed by the incredible Gloaming Grove, who knows what the heck she's doing.

"Gravida" is a medical term for one who carries a pregnancy. "Nulligravida" is the medical phrase used of a pregnant person who has not yet given birth. "Ichiro" literally means "first-born son" in Japanese.

Tite Kubo's, not mine, not for profit.

* * *

Shuuhei Hisagi was very very bored.

Bookstores had this effect on him. He went to the manga section - he didn't know what section Renji Abarai, whose errand this was, had gone to - to see what kind of inaccuracies the newest _Bleach_ had perpetrated. The author remembered a lot, but not everything. Too bad they couldn't have memory-zapped him right at the beginning, but by the time anyone with the authority to okay the zapping had realized he was writing about Soul Society with a fair degree of accuracy, too many people were reading the manga.

What Tite Kubo remembered of Shuuhei Hisagi was particularly amusing, if kinda minuscule. As a result, he wasn't one of the series' main protagonists, but at least his facial tattoos weren't recognizable, which would have made getting about in Karakura Town difficult.

He was occasionally asked about things he had never done in his _life_ - afterlife - back in Soul Society, which was amusing too.

He could wish the guy wasn't so damned accurate about his lack of musical talent, though. Shuuhei closed the tankobon, and went to the musical section.

Five minutes later, that was where Renji Abarai found him. "You find anything good?" Shuuhei said, sliding a technical book on guitar tunings back into the shelf.

"Just what I wanted," the redhead said, with that cheese-eating grin he used for moments when he was particularly pleased with himself, displaying the store's plastic bag dangling from his wrist.

"What is it?" Shuuhei said. Last time he had accompanied Renji to a bookstore, the redhead had bought a copy of Sun Tzu's "Art of War," which was so interesting that a copy of it now graced Shuuhei's own bookcase. The time before that it was Musashi Miyamoto's _Go Rin No Sho_. Shuuhei still read one paragraph of "The Book of Five Rings" every morning, to begin his own meditations.

Those two books were why he accompanied Renji to bookstores in the first place. That and the fact that their captaincies, and the recent conclusion of the Winter War, made an occasional day trip to Karakura simpler to accomplish than a bout of drinking after hours.

As captains, they found they couldn't spare the energy to be hungover the next day. It set a bad example to their troops, as well.

Usually Izuru Kira came with them; but today, the captain of the third could not.

To Shuuhei's amazement, instead of showing him the book, the redhead blushed. "Ain't sayin'."

"Fer kamis' sakes, Renji, what could it possibly be? 'How to Please a Member of the Four Noble Houses in Bed'? Everybody already knows about you and Kuchiki-taichou."

Renji blushed a more furious red. "No, nothing like that."

They reached the sidewalk outside the bookstore and a brief but animated scuffle between the two friends took place. Shuuhei, despite being considerably smaller than Renji, won. Renji still had a few things to learn, one of which he did on the spot: don't piss off those among your friends who are expert hand-to-hand combatants, when you yourself are not.

The bag proved to contain a rather thick mass-market paperback entitled, "What to Expect When You're Expecting."

Shuuhei, considerably quick on the uptake, went pale. "Did I hurt you?"

"It's not for me, sempai-baka."

Shuuhei's jaw dropped and he stopped stock-still while Renji stuffed the book back into its bag. "You ain't sayin' that Kuchiki-taichou - "

"Yeah, well, I guess you're the first to know, oaf. "

Shuuhei gathered his scattered wits about him. "Okay ... "

The redhead flashed him a genuine smile. "Think we can go find some octopus balls and some taiyaki?"

"Isn't he the one that's eating for two?"

"Yeah, shut up. I'll bet you want to know how come it's him that's carryin' the kid."

"Among other things," Shuuhei said dryly, as they headed in the direction of the food-cart area. "By way of congratulations, it's my treat, even though you eat like a horse."

* * *

Six months prior, Sosuke Aizen had been imprisoned. The taichou of Fifth and Sixth Divisions had returned to work upon witnessing this end to the Winter War, and after gone to the manor which was the home of Sixth Division's taichou. There they were joined by dinner guests.

"Strawberries," Ichigo Kurosaki said in surprise. "They aren't in season."

"I hired my cook not only for his culinary abilities but his food-preservation kidou," Byakuya said smoothly, passing the cream.

The boy who had been their savior in this war smiled, and took the pitcher, dousing his berries liberally. "I'll have to keep that in mind."

"Indeed," Byakuya said blandly.

The strawberry had surrendered his powers to defeat Aizen. It would not be much longer before he could no longer perceive Rukia. With the end in sight and no way out, they were dating about as fast as two people could.

The fact that Renji and Byakuya, who had lived together openly from the beginning of the war, occasionally found them adorning the garden with their naked butts while they celebrated, oh, the changing of the seasons, the end of the war, the end of the week, the fact that it was today and not tomorrow (that it was not yesterday called for yet another and of course entirely separate celebration): this was not discussed at the dinner table, but true and known to all parties nonetheless.

Renji, perhaps remembering their last encounter, smiled at them both, and filled their bowls with saké; then Byakuya did the same for him, holding his eyes and smiling.

Ichigo watched this process, then said curiously, "Do you ever miss being on patrol with each other?"

Byakuya shrugged. "I do, yes, but I also know I could arrange it." He transferred his attention to Renji. "Do you miss it?"

Renji smiled at all of them. "I miss the camaraderie from time to time, but something else has taken its place, and I like that better."

They had been a couple too long for him to grasp Byakuya's hand and carry it to his lips, but not so long that he couldn't squeeze the other taichou's knee beneath the table.

"See?" Ichigo said to Rukia. "That's what we're aiming for."

"We could do a lot worse," she agreed.

Renji was not going to let this one go by. "You may have to settle," he said gravely, "for being a heterosexual couple."

Ichigo snorted. "Yeah, we may. Well, on that note, I have to get home. I have a very early start tomorrow, sparring with Kenpachi."

"Are you two nuts?" Renji said, rising with Byakuya.

"You know the answer to that one."

"Which," Rukia added, "is, 'Yes, without qualification!'"

"Baka," Renji said, and smiled at them both.

Byakuya twined an arm through Renji's as they stood by the front door. "Let's let the lovebirds say goodnight," he said. He made the very proper bow of inferior to superior officer to Ichigo, who was still unnerved by it, and then ... Byakuya Kuchiki grinned.

* * *

Byakuya slid shut the fusuma between his private quarters and the hall, as Renji peeled off his haori and hung it on the hook beside the one that would hold Byakuya's in a few moments. The redhead hung his kosode in his own half of the closet, which left him making tea in hakama and shitagi.

Byakuya sighed, and looked at his desk.

"Problems?" his mate said.

"No. Yes. I don't have any problems except not wanting to look at that defense plan again tonight. Even Ichigo is bored with it by now, and I can't plan the defense of Seireitei when I'm bored."

Renji put their tea down on a small table far removed from his desk, and went to his lover, peeling him out of haori and kosode. "Then don't. Give me a few minutes of your time instead."

"You may always have a few minutes of my time, Renji. You know that by now."

"Yes. I am wondering, though," said Renji, sitting seiza in front of Byakuya, "if you would be willing to give some time to someone else."

"If you are talking about a three-way, my answer has not changed. I am not willing to become intimate with anyone else, and if you feel the need to be so ..."

"Not that. I may have made that error six months ago, Byakuya, but if you are monogamous, so be it."

The darker man looked at him, sat seiza himself by Renji's side. "I am still amazed that you were willing to let yourself be ... guided ... by me in that."

Renji shrugged. "I wasn't terribly pleased at the time. But I talked to your cousin Ini, and she helped me to see what I really wanted."

"Which was?"

Renji's cinnamon-colored eyes met Byakuya's dark gray ones. "Your presence in my life as my intimate partner. I am whole with you. If you won't countenance something, I cannot pursue that course of action."

Byakya reached across to kiss him. "Knowing Ini, that wasn't all she said."

Renji sighed. "She made the point that someone who seeks out another partner within the confines of a committed relationship usually isn't dealing with the pressures that have arisen within that relationship. After a few more sessions, I knew what was bothering me, and if you remember, I stopped asking you." He twined a hand into one of Byakuya's, and held it gently.

"What was it?"

"Your social status. It still makes me twitch, you know that."

Byakuya looked into his eyes. "I do know that. Having - having swum in those waters all my life, Renji, I can't say I'm very aware of it."

"No. Well, Ini gave me some pointers on dealing with the sycophants, and that helped a lot. Rukia pitched in a bit too, after she got over her shock at seeing us as a couple."

"I am as fortunate to have her in my life as I was her sister."

"Yes." Renji, not the jealous type, had never made Byakuya uncomfortable about his marriage to Hisana, and did not intend to start being a jerk now. "But this other person, Byakuya - I want a child."

Byakuya gaped at him. "Do you think that wise?"

The redhead smiled. "I don't think falling in love with you was wise. But since I couldn't help it, I went for it, and it's turned out pretty well." He handed Byakuya his tea, took a sip of his own.

Byakuya shook his head. "You can't compare the two."

"No. But think of the freedom you would have if you had a child of your own body, Byakuya."

Byakuya was struck speechless. It was possible, of course, and not even rare for a male shinigami to undergo the course of treatment necessary to bear a child. But if there was one thing the autocratic Kuchiki head had _never_ considered ... his own pregnancy was it.

Renji, having forestalled argument, ticked over the points in favor on his strong fingers. "First of all, you would have a child of your own body to take over the clan. Second, your clan chiefs could stop pestering you to get married, and third, because of that, once the pregnancy is announced, you'd have less dissension to deal with. Fourth, you would have to slow down for a little while in the last three months, and the first few weeks after the baby's born. That would give your partner the opportunity to pamper you he's always wanted, but that you won't stand still for." Renji grinned. "Fifth, you have a competent fukutaichou in Madarame. Let him grow a little. Last but hardly least, we would have a child of our own to raise."

"Compelling arguments, Renji. But except for the clan nonsense, they could all apply to you."

"Nope. You first."

Byakuya tilted his head in that way he had which made Renji fall in love with him all over again about once every two weeks. "Why?"

"Because if the first child comes from my body, there will always be some skepticism over whether he, or she, is yours. If you birth our first, that's undeniably your heir."

"Closely reasoned, taichou."

"And all of it true, Byakuya-taichou."

"Yes, very well. I'll send Unohana-taichou a butterfly in the morning."

Renji smiled so broadly his cheekbones began to hurt. "No. I want you to think about this for a full week, Byakuya-taichou. I know what I'm askin' of you, even if you don't. You think about it. Then you make that appointment with Unohana-taichou, and get a lot more information. Then you think about it for another couple of days. _Then_ you say yes, or you say no, and I respect your decision either way."

"Why the delay?"

"Because," Renji said gently, "another person, who will depend entirely on us, is involved. I love you - "

"I love you, too, Renji. You know that."

"Thank you. I did know that, but it never hurts to hear it. Taichou, if you decide to do this, it has to be because you want to, not because I want you to."

* * *

"Morning sickness," Unohana-taichou said crisply. "That's all."

"That's all? Is there nothing you can do for it?" Byakuya said, wrapping the patient's white yukata more closely around himself.

His pregnancy wasn't far enough established to show yet, and in fact he was surprised that the treatments had apparently taken effect immediately. He'd known he was pregnant only for two weeks. About six weeks along, Unohana-taichou said.

Byakuya Kuchiki, nulligravida, sat on the examination table, Renji standing beside him with a strong warm arm around his still-slender body.

"Not much. There's quite a lot you can do for yourself, though, Byakuya." She was busy writing illegibly on a prescription pad. "Always keep lemon slices or freshly prepared lemon juice at your bedside. Lemon is quite effective in reducing morning sickness. Get plenty of fluids, water, fresh fruit juice. Mix an equal amount, one tablespoon each, of apple-cider vinegar and honey in a cup of warm water, and drink it before bedtime. Some people get relief from eating dry crackers. Use lavender as a room freshener. Cut down on the spicy foods. Chew a bit of ginger, plain or candied, when the nausea strikes." She tore off the sheet and put it into one of Fourth Division's mail-delivery tubes. "This is a prescription for a B-complex vitamin that's high in vitamin B-6. It'll be delivered to the mansion."

Byakuya sighed. "It's quite embarrassing to have to leave the taichous' meeting to vomit."

Unohana, who had delivered her share of babies, knew very well that Captain Priss was going to be in for many more, and more embarrassing, shocks over the next seven and half months. She forebore to mention this. "Yes, but all of us knew what was happening, and no one thought much of it. Ichigo was actually quite amused."

"The damned ryoka would be," Byakuya said grimly, and Renji snickered.

"That's no way to speak of him," Unohana said, trying to disguise her own smile.

Renji was a few minutes late getting home that night, because he stopped to buy lemons and candied ginger.

* * *

"Good kami," Kenpachi Zaraki said to Byakuya Kuchiki. "Is it gonna be like this th' whole nine months?"

Byakuya had come as he always did on Tuesday nights to play battleships with Kenpachi.

_They_ called it "understanding the military strategies of the Living World," and stared down those who called it anything else. Kenpachi took off his eyepatch to impress the correct name upon transgressors, which meant that the ones who survived didn't do it again. They had begun with Yachiru's dolls, but moved on to plastic recreations... but it was still playing battleships.

The noble reseated himself. "The first three and the last three months, they tell me."

"Can you sleep through th' night?"

"So far. This every-twenty-minutes schedule is a major disadvantage, though." The clan head sighed. "The pregnancy book that Renji got me is very clear that right now, I have to urinate so often because the baby is creating large amounts of water-soluble waste. Later, during the last few weeks of pregnancy, the baby is so large that its head takes up part of the space the bladder usually does."

Kenpachi consulted the journal of the Naval Institute and moved two battleships before he said slowly, "I ain't never had a friend who was pregnant before, Byakuya, but that's still too much information."

* * *

"Ah, kami, you're beautiful."

Byakuya frowned. "I am getting fat."

"Your pardon, sir," said the portrait artist who had been called in to ply her craft before the baby came, "but in my business I must know how to draw people. Fat people, thin people, pregnant people." She paused for a moment to get precisely the look on Renji's face as he bent his head toward Byakuya, whose waistline was now expanding visibly. "Fatness and pregnancy are not the same, even when the person becomes fat and pregnant at the same time. They lie differently on the body, and they ... accumulate ... differently." She erased one line to replace it with another, shaded the resulting shape a bit differently, and on her drawing Byakuya's arm was suddenly eloquent of the caring he felt toward Renji, just as it was in the flesh. "There is no mistaking the one for the other, sir, and you display only the attributes of pregnancy."

Byakuya flushed. "I see. Thank you."

Later, as Renji escorted the artist out of Byakuya's private rooms, he took quite a large bill from his pocket and pressed it into her hand. "Thank you," he said.

"But, sir ... I have already been given my retainer."

Renji looked her straight in the eyes. "This is extra. You reassured my partner in there in a way I can't, and right now he needs that."

The artist bowed. "I thank you, sir."

"No, I thank you. We will see you again tomorrow?"

"Yes, sir." The butler fielded the artisan, and Renji returned to their quarters.

He found Byakuya sitting in the western-style chair that went back and forth on curved feet. He was not rocking, however, merely sitting with his eyes closed and his head back.

Renji sat seiza in front of him. "Tired, taichou?"

Byakuya said, "I cannot think why sitting for a portrait, an hour at a time, is so exhausting."

"You have a fitting with your tailor in two hours. He's coming here."

Byakuya opened his eyes. "You arranged that?"

"He wasn't unwilling. He offers his congratulations, by the way."

Byakuya smiled. "I think I shall lie down until he comes."

The first time Byakuya had said that a few weeks prior, Renji freaked out, and promptly (but quietly) fetched the _What to Expect When You're Expecting_ tome. Which was reassuring. At the beginning of his second trimester, Byakuya could expect to be tired as part of the normal processes of pregnancy.

Unohana had removed Byakuya from the active-duty lists two months before. Renji had never told Byakuya how relieved he was when that happened. Now, he rose from seiza, picked his lover up from the chair, and carried him to the western-style bed Byakuya and his belly found it easier to deal with than a floor-based futon.

Renji fetched that one of the silk throws he liked best, the lavender, to float out over Byakuya, belly and all, and then ran his hand along the distinctive curve. "Beautiful," he said.

"I am glad you think so," Byakuya murmured, and turned onto his side. Renji brought the pillows out, and fitted them to support the belly, the back, the legs. Byakuya smiled his thanks, and promptly fell asleep.

Renji watched him for a couple of minutes. He was, he thought, the luckiest man on earth.

But, the work that they were doing together called from the two desks that were placed side-by-side across the room. Renji went to his, and began.

An hour and a half later, he roused himself. The tailor would be here soon.

Byakuya slept on, a flush of increased blood circulation pinking the visible cheek a bit. Renji went to his knees beside the bed, and began stroking the hair not confined by Byakuya's kenseikan.

Blue eyes fluttered open a few minutes later.

"Hey," Renji whispered, smiling.

Byakuya smiled back. "The tailor is coming."

"Yes, in a few minutes."

"Mmm. Help me up, please."

Renji removed the pillows and the blanket, and offered his strong arm to Byakuya.

By the time the tailor came, they were embarked upon a discussion of the work Renji had completed while Byakuya slept. They broke off when the butler said, "Your tailor, sirs," and shut the door behind the man.

The tailor bowed to Byakuya and to Renji. "Sirs," he said.

"Ah, good day, Otomasu-san," Byakuya said. "I am in need of your services. As one might expect, my hakama have grown too tight."

Hakama are not fitted so closely as western pants, but their construction is less loose than the amount of material in them might lead one to believe. As a result, they have some flexibility, but not a great deal, and Byakuya's belly had now exceeded his hakama's expansion capacity.

"If I may, sir," said the tailor, bowing, "I would also expect that you will need shitagi and kosode that will accommodate your body's changes. They may not be necessary now, but they will be in time."

Byakuya's eyes twinkled. "I shall bow to your greater knowledge in this area, Otomasu-san," he said gravely. "I shall need three shitagi, three hakama, and two kosode. My haori will have to suffice as it is."

The tailor bowed. Renji said suddenly, "Otomasu-san, if you could tailor them so that the hems may be let down to accommodate my greater height, I should appreciate it. And perhaps, if a haori were indeed made for pregnancy ..."

"Renji, why?" Byakuya said, staring at him.

"You won't be pregnant again," the redhead said with a lazy smile, as the tailor's tape measure scribed Byakuya's girth, "and next time, it's my turn."

Byakuya gazed at him blankly. "I didn't know until now that you were committed to this." The tailor, his measurements complete, retreated.

Renji caressed his cheek. "I am committed to you, taichou, and to this one." The curve of Byakuya's belly slid under his big hand; Byakuya had never felt so ... so _cherished_ in his entire life, as when Renji did that. "And to his or her sibling. I want your child, just as you have been generous enough to bear mine."

Behind them, the tailor stayed silent, and laid out only fabric he knew would suit both.

* * *

"I ain't never had a friend as high-maintenance as you," the kenpachi grunted. He finished re-tying Byakuya's waraji - Byakuya's belly being too big to allow him to perform this office for himself any longer - and stood up.

"Thank you, Kenpachi. I am grateful."

The big man snorted. "So ya should be. Shall I come ta the mansion tamarra? Be a little easier for ya than bein' on the floor at my place, I'd think."

"Yes, it would be. In addition, Renji has forbidden me to leave the manor except for taichous' meetings until I deliver."

"Can't be long now."

"No. I was due two days ago, but Unohana-taichou tells me that one can go over by two weeks. Any longer than that, she says, and she'll schedule a surgical birth."

"Good kami. You know what you was gettin' inta?"

"I did, yes." They walked down the main street of Seireitei (or rather Kenpachi walked, and Byakuya, this late in his pregnancy, waddled). Renji had been delayed by a meeting with Ichigo, and asked Kenpachi to see his partner home. "Will you come to the delivery?"

"You gonna have the clan there?"

"Yes."

"I'll be there with my bells on, buddy. Ye're gonna need protection against those assholes."

Byakuya smiled. "Unohana-taichou says that she will manage that."

"I'm her back-up," growled the kenpachi, and let it go at that.

"Hmm." Byakuya waddled on. "Well, there are some things I need to tell you, then."

* * *

Kenpachi Zaraki assumed his usual postcoital position in Retsu Unohana's bed: supine, spine straight as a die, hands behind his head. This allowed Retsu to assume hers: curled up into Kenpachi's leanness, head on his bony chest.

Usually, Kenpachi responded to this by putting one large warm hand on her back. No different this time. But his chest rumbled into speech: "I'm a little worried about Byakuya's delivery," he said to Byakuya's physician.

"How so?" said Retsu, who was bound by all kinds of oaths over what she could and could not tell him.

"He was tellin' me today that if I'd come to th' delivery, he'd ask me ta make sure that alla the sub-clan heads see him deliver, up close and personal. There's three of 'em. I'm a little worried about that; three of 'em could cook up somethin' ta harm him or th' baby that I couldn't prevent by m'self."

"Oh no. That's not going to happen. Byakuya and I have spoken about it already, and as there is nothing medical at all about the Kuchiki's traditional solution, I can fill you in on it." Kenpachi's lover caressed him, and did that little thing.

He laughed.

* * *

"He made it ten days past due date. That's good. How far apart are the pains?" Unohana-taichou said crisply, setting down a black leather bag any doctor from the last century would have recognized. Beyond her, Kotetsu-fukutaichou opened her own bag, and began to lay out a dizzying number of scary steel things.

Of course, it wasn't like Renji was not frightened out of his mind for his partner to begin with. Byakuya had maintained his good cheer right up until this morning, when he rose as usual, but felt so bad he lay back down within a very few minutes. Renji's hand had been on his partner's belly, offering comfort, when he felt the first powerful contraction of impending birth.

Ignoring Byakuya's protests, he sent Hell butterflies to Unohana, Rukia, Ukitake, and Kenpachi.

"No pains. He says he just feels lousy," Renji said, his eyes on Byakuya.

Byakuya lay on the western-style bed and sweated. He thought he probably had the flu, felt nauseated and disoriented. He wasn't having what he was prepared to think of as labor pains, although his belly ached.

Unohana pulled out a white package of pills. "Didn't you say Kenpachi's coming?"

"Yes."

"Good. I asked him to guard the door until I know where we are. He's going to make sure the clan members are all under control. You'll be busy, and distracted." She laid the package of pills on the table, then shoved a larger blue package into Renji's hands. "You go shower, and change into these."

When Renji got back, Byakuya had changed his position from one side to his back, with his feet propped up pillows to allow Unohana to do ... whatever it was she did. The butler had surrendered control of the door to Byakuya's rooms to Kenpachi. Renji went to Byakuya, stroked his forehead, said, "How ya doin', taichou?"

"Renji." Byakuya opened his eyes. "This part's not good."

"No. We knew that." Renji put his hand delicately on the gravida's belly.

"Feels good when you do that," Byakuya murmured, closing his eyes.

"Keep your eyes open, Byakuya," Unohana-taichou said sharply, from between his feet. "Keep your breathing going."

"Yes, ma'am."

The three sub-clan heads entered the room with Kenpachi, who nodded to Renji and followed them, much as a dog with _very_ intent eyes follows the flock it is driving.

"Renji, come here. I need to talk to you for a moment. Isane! Do the counting and focusing with Kuchiki-taichou for a moment, will you please?"

Renji arrived by Byakuya's knee, put one hand on it. Unohana, watching gods-knew-what at the floor of Byakuya's pelvis, said, "He hasn't yet felt any pain. Either he's going to experience only pressure, or this is going to become overwhelmingly painful very quickly. In either case, I need you at Byakuya's head, Renji. If you faint, you'll hit the floor. Isane and I are both going to be busy."

Renji made her the bow of student to teacher. "Taichou."

Unohana-taichou smiled. "Go take care of my patient," she said.

* * *

The imposing figure of Kenpachi Zaraki stood so that he could see the Kuchikis, most of whom were green around the gills and sweating. That put his back to Byakuya, but he didn't need to see his friend. Retsu was takin' care'a preggy-boy medically, an' it was his job ta take care'a this bunch. Not medically, 'cause he'd never seen sucha buncha creeps in his _life_, an' he'd be more'n likely ta let 'em all die. By accident, y'understand. But keepin' 'em in line? That he could do.

Th' one he was most worried about - almost his own height, an' far more muscular - had been reduced to a quiverin' hulk by th' simple expedient'a givin' him three o' Retsu's pills. Now, he lay on th' floor, curled around his own gut, moanin'.

Retsu said th' pills were empathy-enhancers, and they were always given to sub-clan heads when a Kuchiki was about to deliver an heir. These guys were all feelin' what Byakuya was feelin'. Emotionally, and physically.

The thought made Kenpachi grin: she'd also explained to him that when Byakuya's hormones got done doin' their dance, these guys'd all be as much the kid's parent as Byakuya. That meant that they'd be as inta th' brat's welfare as its own parents, and that th' baby would be safe from clan interference, which not so far back in Kuchiki history had risen to th' level o' murder. To that, the drug Retsu had developed specifically for the Kuchikis was an elegant solution.

Kenpachi admired elegant solutions.

Unlike his clan cousins, Byakuya wasn't moanin'. Or cryin', like half these guys and that silly lookin' woman who Byakuya said was his great-aunt. Byakuya occasionally gave a grunt.

Renji was in tears, but Kenpachi wasn't willin' ta think less o' him fer that. The kenpachi wasn't findin' this easy ta listen to, either, an' he hoped like hell his little girl would decide to stay single alla her life. Or failin' that, never ever get pregnant.

A thin wail soared through the room. Unohana's voice said, "One more good push, Byakuya!"

Thanks to Byakuya's coachin', Kenpachi knew what his part here was, an' he picked up the three most important Kuchikis after Byakuya by their collars an' dragged them over to th' view station. They had ta be able to swear that th' kid was Byakuya's, an' he was goin' to make sure they could.

Presented with the incontrovertible truth, two of the three turned green; the third was still curled around his own belly. The kenpachi handed the vulnerable pair barf basins, and turned his back on the spectacle to pick the third man up again, and hold him upright to witness. When he released him, the guy fell to the floor.

But now, unfortunately, Kenpachi too could swear that the kid was Byakuya's.

* * *

Byakuya sat gingerly in the rocking chair, took two-day-old Ichiro Kuchiki from his little boy's nurse, and offered his breast to the child.

Renji, returning from his first day back at work, drew in his breath, and slid shut the fusuma behind him.

Their first two days, the redhead knew, of the rest of his life. Of Byakuya's life, as well.

"Welcome home ... What is it?" said Byakuya, against all the odds Renji's partner, raising his gaze to the cinnamon eyes.

"I have never seen anything so beautiful in my entire life," said Renji Abarai, "as you and our baby." He hung his haori, and went to kneel in front of his family.

* * *

In four years, some things don't change at _all_. Shuuhei Hisagi and Izuru Kira were with Renji Abarai in Karakura, chasing down food carts instead of Hollows.

"Where are you putting all of this?" Shuuhei asked Renji, who was embarking on his third serving of takoyaki.

Renji blushed.

Shuuhei stared at him. "We get finished here, let's go to a bookstore."

The other two gaped. Shuuhei, _Shuuhei_, suggesting a bookstore? "Why?" Izuru said eventually. "You need another chord dictionary?"

"No," Shuuhei said, balling up the detritus from his own lunch and stuffing it into the nearest waste can. "Renji needs his own copy of _What to Expect When You're Expecting_."


End file.
